I just sat there. Looking out of my window. Knowing that this was the last time…
You decided that I’ve made too many mistakes and too many wrong choices. I was ready for another try, another chance like all the times before. All those late nights with meaningless arguments. You didn’t even look back at me, as you walked to the car. The thought of being on my own was scary and not something I was ready to face.

All the troubles of knowing that we live in a small town, that everyone would know, the awkward moments where I wouldn’t be able to avoid you. What is going to happen with our friends, which side will they be on? All these thoughts were in my head as you started the car and drove away. As you backed up my driveway, you looked back at me right in my eyes with your beautiful green eyes.

It was a summer night it all started. I was together with my best friend David. We were at the beach, at this after party David had been talking about for weeks. People were beginning to get drunk and the sun wasn’t even gone yet. “I want you to meet someone“ David said to me as he poked me on the shoulder. That was the first time I saw you, I will never forget how you made my heart skip a beat, and how my hands started shaking.

David had tried so many times to arrange a meeting with you, and I always had an excuse but this time I couldn’t get out of it. I looked at your long brown hair, going all the way down on your back and your green eyes were so bright and full of life. I tried saying my name, but no words came out of my mouth.
The most beautiful laugh escaped from your lips “Hi… I’m Cait”. I knew from this moment that I had to do everything I could to see you again.
I remember how sure David, and myself for that matter, was that we would match perfect together.

What about that one night where I forgave you for your mistakes. I wasn’t sure that I was able to forgive you, but I knew that I had to.
You are my world, my one and only. Just the idea of you and someone else together makes me so jealous and angry I can’t even contain myself – but somehow I did manage to forgive you.
That evening where you came home a little too drunk and where you forgot about me. The words you said that evening still hurts but you have properly forgot all about it.

So here I am, writing you this letter that you will never get to read. I know that I can’t let you be with him.
I’ll put my arms around you while we are lying down together in your bed. Your lips were slowly turning blue, as the dripping sounds of your blood hitting the floor were going slower. I would let my lips touch yours and knowing that we will always be together.