A friend in Hamburg tells me I belong here and will get fantastically rich almost overnight by telling you funny and interesting and heart-breaking tales. Wonderful, I have some of those! (WARNING: there are embedded links throughout what follows, but Steemit needs to pick a different color for those -- the blue is hard to pick out next to the black type. But they're here.)

I live on Maui, write books of Taoist teachings like the I Ching, Tao te Ching, Art of War, and more, and have five beautifully designed apps of those (all here). My I Ching app is #1 in the world and has been for years, by golly (due in large part to the genius of my developer). If you read my reviews on Amazon, it seems that I am nearly a buddha. My personal view is that I am 97% fool. YMMV.

I also have a big idea for making the world a better place that you can read about or watch a five minute video on here. I need about $20M to launch that, so please upvote the living shit out of my posts a.s.a.p. so your children and mine can go on enjoying humpback whales, elephants, and flamingoes instead of having Earth descend into the fiery hellscape that demons like Trump and Clinton are guaranteed to deliver us. I would like to take this opportunity apologize for the overlarge influence of my often ass-backward nation, it is half-full of people like this:

Some of them are highly entertaining to talk to, as long as they don't have a beer in one hand and a handgun in the other, which they tend to do. But letting them vote is a questionable practice, as you may have observed.

I have a serious neurological disorder which I'll tell you about once I've made several hundred thousand USD for introducing myself with this post. I'm either going to defeat this wicked mofo with a lot of weird healing modalities and constant play in the water and the forest, or I'm going to die soon, be buried at sea in the great blue Pacific Ocean off Maui, and be eaten by bone-eating zombie worms:

That's a real creature and that's their actual name, they live in the ocean and eat carcasses as they descend toward the bottom. After I die in screaming neurological agony, if that is what comes to pass, my spirit is going to swim through the ocean/sky while the zombie worms are eating my body.

Then you will be able to find me here, which I am rather looking forward to:

Here's a parting gift from my lil' book Wei wu Wei Ching:

____________________________________________

無妄

Hexagram 25: WU WANG / INNOCENCE

A deep

and sophisticated

understanding of Buddhism,

Taoism, Zen, Chan, philosophy,

meditation technique -- none of these

is necessary to attain realization.

They are just as likely to

ensnare you in towers

of complicated

thought.

Abide

in the simple

understanding that

buddha nature is always,

has always been, will always be,

your own nature. Breathe into

that. Breathe out from it.

That is all.